Want To


Had my annual physical last week. My doctor is questioning. I'm answering. We get to my recent neck injury. Got it training for my first marathon. (Yes, I said "neck." It can happen. It just took a yeahoo like me to prove it. If you care, I'll tell you, but back to the story...)

"The human body just wasn't designed for that," he impassively states of marathoning & moves on to the next question. I restrain my urge to confront my dear doctor who I now worry may be a pessimistic heretic of the seemingly limitless capabilities of the human body. Shame.

His point I understand. It is not natural to run 26.2 miles. Many think it is not sane. Yet millions prove this wrong every year. We human-folk are astonishing. God designed us with amazing bodies capable of feats limited only by our incredible imaginations. It takes proper training. Lots of time. Self-discipline. Want to.

We human-folk can do. And me, I want to run. I love to run. I want to because I love to.

So I'm running this AM. Praying as I do. Sunrise soaked. Breeze cooled. The above comes to mind. The Lord speaks to my heart.

Aaron, is it natural for you to sin?

Sure, Lord. Hard not to. I was born with a sin nature. You know the drill.

What keeps you from sinning, Aaron?

I don't want to.

Why don't you want to? Duty? Obedience? Or something else?

Yes, Lord. You got me. I gotta confess. Sometimes it's sheer will power. Other times it's the duty. Externalized religion. I am a pastor. I'm supposed to have it together. But, Lord Jesus, would you continue to change that in me? Please. Would you, Lord Jesus, help me fall so much in love with you that I don't want to sin because... because I love you that much... because I don't won't to hurt you... because my relationship with you is of greater value than all else of life. Give me want to because I love you, Lord.

"Whoever has my commands & obeys them,
he is the one who loves me.
He who loves me will be loved by my Father,
& I too will love him & show myself to him."
Jesus in John 14:21.