Twins

3:06am. Woke up hurting fierce. Fiery pain in my belly. Front, left side. Just above the belt.

Unmistakable pain.

Kidney stone.

Woke up Melanie. Writhed in pain. Broke into feverish sweat. Thankfully Mamaw & Karli are here from Louisiana so we didn't need to wait for childcare.

This is my third kidney stone, but first since we've had children. A few days after I'd endured stone two, I'd heard from a co-worker who'd had three children—naturally—and two kidney stones that stones hurt worse than childbirth. Of course that evening I went home & announced this to Melanie. I was, in a sense, defending my honor and propping up my wounded ego after my unmanly behavior of rolling on the living room floor wanting to cry for my Mama. Melanie, ever quick, her eyes fixed like pins popping my balloon stated, "If you breathe a breath of that when I am in labor, I will slap you into next week!"

I still tell that story, however. Just did. You read it. But, just to make sure you know, I tell you here: I was smart enough not to mention it during the birth of any of our children.

Back to today... Got my kind nurse. Got my confident nursing student. Got my little open back gown. Got my IV. Got my nicer than expected lady doc. Got some morphine.

Didn't take the edge off. Kidney stone pain tends to come in waves. Not unlike contractions. Mine were coming about every three minutes at that point. That means its time to deliver, right?

Got to the cat scan room. Didn't hear a meow. Maybe a purr as that thing spun. Not even the sight of any shed fur. It is a hospital you know. Clean. Gotta ask how they remediate that pesky fur.

Quicker than I knew it was legal as per some unspoken hospital rule I got my test results. Resisting my urge to ask where the cats were hidden, I got the news from the doc. Yes, my medical layman's diagnosis was accurate: kidney stone. 3.5 millimeters.

The good news: It is ready to pass soon.

The bad news: There is a second one "up in there." Her professional medical terminology.

Twins. One is ready to deliver. Soon I hope. The other may linger.

Got some Toradol. That worked. After two hours in pain, ten minutes of Toradol had me feeling much better. And the doc even threw in a RX for the road so I could go home before my sleeping kids even knew I'd been gone: Hydrocodone.

So, in honor of the drugs that work for me, I decided right there to name my pain in waves like contraction causing twins, Tori and Hydi.

Yes, I'm "under the influence" even now. Could you tell? A cheap-drunk pastor with a laptop and a blog can be a dangerous thing. My hope is that I made you smile & maybe even laugh.

My greater hope, however, is to deliver the twins soon.

Who I Am

The reFocusing proccess at my church asked us to discover who God has created us to be. As a reminder to myself, here I am.

My Biblical Purpose

I exist to be loved by God through the risen Savior & the powerful Spirit.

My Values

1. Kingdom: Living faithfully by the principles of the eternal Kingdom of Heaven.

2. Discipleship: Becoming evermore Christ-like & influencing others to be the same.

3. Missionary: Extending the Kingdom in an Acts 1:8 movement.

4. Courage: Surrendering in faith to take risks for the Kingdom.

5. Family: Loving my family whole-heartedly without compromise.

My Vision

My vision is to love my family in words and actions, prayers and presence as God loves me so that Melanie will be vibrant and my children will be confident.

My vision is to love the Church as a discerning pastor and a passionate preacher as Christ loves me so that we might see with an eternal perspective, walk in transformational discipleship, and live with a missional impact.

I desire the Kingdom of Heaven to be enlarged because I gave my life away.

Present Tense

Somewhere along the way in one of my preacher books I learned that our English word eulogy means "good words." At any memorial service I officiate, I am sure to recall as I know, or call on others who do know, to speak good words about the person who has passed from this life.

Today, I write facing the inevitable passing of a trusted friend. I know his eternal destiny is secure in the hands of Jesus, but I mourn. I have been encouraged to think what I might say when officiating his memorial service. I know the Christlike character traits he exhibits that I will extol. I know I will preach from the book of James. I know I'll cry like I am right now...

But I know one more thing.

It would be unrighteous for me to wait until after he has passed into his eternal reward to speak these words of him. I must speak them to him while I still can.

Rather than saying, "I loved him because he was," to others, I must say, "I love you because you are," to him.

When you have something good to say--not just to the person near to heaven, but to everyone, anytime--when you notice an admirable deed, when you hear a kind word, when you see Christlike character, don't wait. Speak your blessing at that moment. Offer your praise without delay.

Philippians 4:8 challenges,

whatever is true

whatever is noble

whatever is pure

whatever is lovely

whatever is admirable

if anything is excellent or praiseworthy

think about such things.

Speak about them too. 

Present tense.

Love One Another

There are a lot of "one anothers" commanded in the New Testament. Jesus both initiated & summarized those commands as quoted in John 13:34-35.

"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this will all men know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."

Christ-followers should love one another. Sounds easy enough, right? But what does a loving relationship look like?

Don’t imagine amorous or romantic “love” when answering these questions. Don’t think of how you “love” grandma’s pie or when your favorite team wins. We are talking about biblical agape love—the otherish love—the type of love that elevates the needs of another person above our own. It is the opposite of self-ish. Many times it is self-less.

When is the last time you felt loved in an agape, otherish way? When someone served you—your family had a sickness or tragedy & others brought you meals, sent you notes, prayed with you, & even cleaned your house. When someone gave you their time—you needed help watching the kids or another set of hands to finish a project. When someone gave & would take nothing in return—you wanted to pay them because you were overwhelmed by their generosity of time or service. When someone sacrificed joyfully for you—you smiled or maybe even cried because you saw the joy in their eyes at being able to love you in an agape, otherish way.

As Christ-followers we can not make one another love in this agape, otherish way. We can’t force it. We can’t program it. We can’t require it.

Yet as Christ-followers we can expect it. We can pray for it. We can look for ways to employ ourselves for others. We can live it.

Do not withhold. Love. Do not complain. Love. Do not give up. Love. Do not judge. Love. Do not walk away. Love.

Love one another, Jesus said. Agape one another. Otherish one another. Put one another first. Humble ourselves. Elevate others. Sacrifice ourselves. Serve others.

By this agape, otherish love may we be known & make Christ known to the world.

Tomorrow Today

I was lazy yesterday morning. My alarm went off in the dark predawn. I decided to stay warm in bed. An hour later Melanie got up and went to the gym. I stayed warm in bed.

About 6:30 I heard some footsteps. Four year old Mary Elizabeth. I could tell. She stopped at her Mama's side of the bed in the dark.

Baby, it's too early for you to be up. Come around here and Daddy will lift you up and you can lay in Mama's spot and go back to sleep a while.

She didn't say a word as she trudged around. I lifted her up on the bed and pulled the covers over her. And Mary Elizabeth, who never wants to wear socks to bed because her feet will be too hot, tucked her cold little toes under me and laid her sweet little hand on my arm falling off to sleep in just moments. Precious.

Thirty minutes later the sonorous walk clock strikes 7:00 and Mary stirs a bit. I was ready to get up by then. I'd been wide awake listening to her breathe and breathing out prayers of my own. It's still dark when I speak to her again.

Baby, are you ready to wake up?

"Mmmmmm," comes her plaintive, sleepy reply.

Today you get to go to your friend's house to play. We've got to get up and get ready.

Springing up faster than if she'd snatched up an offered M&M she exclaimed, "It's tomorrow today!"

Yes, it is tomorrow today.

A tomorrow my precious little lady anticipated had arrived. And so the day began.

It is January 20, 2009 and our nation welcomes a long anticipated tomorrow today as well. The United States of America will inaugurate as our new President, Barak Obama. Our nation founded and sustained by women and men who hold these truths to be self evident, who toiled for a dream that one day, and who gave their very lives for our liberty with so much history before welcomes history in the making today.

No matter your politics or religious convictions I pray that you will join me in praying for our new President, the man God ordained. Pray for his godly wisdom and that of his advisers in a role that requires so much more than one man can perform. Pray for his daily study of the Bible and counsel of it's teachings to know the realities that truly govern our nation and world. Pray for his safety and that of his family in nation where some would seek to harm him due to the color of his skin. Pray for our nation to unite and pray that revival may come and stir us with heavenly fire anew.

It is tomorrow today.

Let us pray.