Overcoming Isolation

Isn’t it crazy. With all our devices—smart phones & plain old phones, iPads & computers—and all our means to stay connected—calling, texting, emailing, writing, Skype, FaceTime, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, SnapChat, Pintrest—that we can still be so lonely. So isolated. Isn’t it crazy.

We are lonely people. We live within proximity but without presence. We have relationships without personal contact. We exercise familiarity without true feelings. 

Due to fear. Or busyness. Or pride. Or selfishness. Or pain. Or past. Or depression. Or psychosis. We live alone in a world of people. We live not truly knowing or being known.

We are naturally self-centered and tend to view the world through the filter of our own lives. But we were not designed to be isolated. God created us for relationship. With him and with others. God calls us to live for him and for others.

1 Peter 3:8-12 shows us how to overcome isolation. 

Be selfless—verse 8 says, “Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble.” What characteristics of selflessness are listed here? Exercising them will break isolation as you do good to others. 

Be forgiving—verse 9 states, “Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.” Unforgiveness leads to bitterness, anger, enmity, and hatred. Forgiveness restores unity and breaks isolation. 

Be self-controlled—verse 10 quotes, “For, ‘Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech.’” How do you  control your speech? You might be able to control it sometimes by yourself, but God can change your heart and your speech will follow.

Be peace-making—verse 11 instructs, “They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it.” Where does true peace comes from? Peace overcomes isolation; it reconnects you with God and people. 

Be righteous—verse 12 reminds, “For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” Where does my righteousness come from? Righteousness restores unity. It overcomes isolation.

If you are wondering how you become any of the five "be" statements above, then seek God first. Break your isolation from him. Through his love, by the Holy Spirit, he will work this character qualities within you.

Then put down your electronic device. Step away. Go look someone in the eye. And have a real conversation.

On the Lips

The Book of Proverbs is loaded with down-to-earth, common-sense, sage advice for every day living. You want to live better: read a chapter a day; live by what you read. Better life guaranteed.

If you are not a regular Bible reader—it makes all the difference in your perspective & processing of life—then you can start simple. Read one chapter of Proverbs a day. Chapter number corresponding to the day of the month.

Don’t worry if you get behind. Just keep it simple & read that day. 

Don’t worry about the months with less than 31 days. Just read extra or wait until the next month.

Don’t worry that I’m going to let you off the hook. Just read a chapter a day. It’s that easy. 

Let me share a little wisdom on interpersonal communication to whet your appetite.

Listen and keep. Do I listen to my parents? No matter my age. Proverbs 1:8—Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.

Hold it. When should I speak less? Rather be though a fool... you know the cliche. Proverbs 10:19—Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues. 

Fruity lips. What fruit am I growing? Better than the striped gum. Proverbs 12:14—From the fruit of their lips people are filled with good things, and the work of their hands brings them reward.

Wrath away. How gentle am I? Pot stirrers need not apply. Proverbs 15:1—A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. 

On the lips. Am I always honest? Pucker up. Proverbs 24:26—An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips. 

Lying and honesty, speaking or holding back, listening and wisdom. They are all in there. These are just five of hundreds of proverbs on interpersonal communication alone. Then there are all the other topics of wisdom or foolishness and on and on. You gotta read it to find out.

Chapter a day.

Change your life.

Sisterhood of the Great Commandment

I am who I am as a Christ-follower and pastor due to the Sisterhood of the Great Commandment. This Great Commandment love humbles and honors all who consider how much they have received. Meet a few Sisters whose love has influenced this pastor.

As a scrawny seven-year-old, I remember sitting on the white bench in our narrow Sunday School room, listening to Miss Nita explain the “gos-pill.” If only I could take the gos-pill, then I would go to Heaven when I died. Church seemed longer that Sunday waiting to talk to my parents. After worship, I raced to the car rather than racing around the church.  When my parents asked the standard Sunday question, “What did you learn in Sunday School today?” I had a burning question for them: “Do you have a gos-pill so I can take it and go to Heaven when I die?”

Soon my parents discerned what we know as adults: The Gospel can be accepted as simply as a pill can be taken. Miss Nita’s gos-pill opened my heart. My parents explained the Gospel that day and I trusted Christ.  

I wonder how many of you teach antsy-pants little boys? Do you wonder if you are making a difference? Do you picture their future with Christ?

Thank you, Miss Nita, and each Sister of the Great Commandment serving in Sunday School and nursery.

As a bed-headed, grumbly-tummy teenager I would often make my way to the kitchen to break the fast well before the breakfast hour. Each of these mornings, there in the living room, quiet hearted, Bible opened, and head bowed in prayer or study was my Momma. Morning after morning. Year after year. 

I heard about a “quiet time” at my first youth camp, but had already seen it in action for years through my Momma’s example. I knew its effect too as my Momma stood by me through the sometimes stormy teenage years. Always patient. Always willing to listen.  A disciple of Jesus, not only in her disciplined study, but more so in her loving application.

Sisters, I know you may be tired. Being a mother is tough. Single moms have the toughest job on earth. Yet, if it were not for you Moms, the world would stop spinning.  We can not make it without your loving sacrifice. Can you make it without daily recounting the sacrificial the love of Christ?

Thank you, Momma, and every Sister following Jesus as examples to others within the Great Commandment.

Crusty was Howard. Elegant was Maxie. He was a hard-working, thick-handed farmer with a dirty pick-up. She was a classy, artist who drove a spotless luxury car whose home was straight out of a decorator’s magazine. More than aesthetic beauty, however, was the welcoming hospitality within. 

They took in this collegiate preacher boy as needed. Their hospitality included a room so fancy I was near afraid to sleep, and a breakfast so big I’d need to put in a hard day’s work. 

One day I noticed a package slip as I peeked into my PO box. Cookies from home?  No, a mail order package. Nice pants and a handsome shirt. And a simple note, “Just because. Maxie.”

Don’t you just love to give the perfect gift? The unexpected? Does your giving mirror that of the Heavenly Father?

Thank you, Maxie, and each Sister who gives from a Great Commandment heart. 

A busy missions fair. A busy missionary nurse. Busy because she was taking blood pressures or because she was so charming? I said to my buddy, “I am going to get my blood pressure checked too.” Moments later her hands were on arm and my heart was aflutter. Months later she was my wife. 

Nearly fourteen years, three churches and three children later I can tell you story after story of the amazing, sacrificial love of my bride, Melanie. Tears welling now as some memories are too precious to share. Influenced by godly women herself, she has poured out her life for our family, our church family and friends. I am amazed by her.

Do you know that kind of motherly love? I pray you do. Have you experienced that kind of sacrifice? Maybe you have lived that love?

Thank you, Melanie, and every Sister who is a sacrificially loving Great Commandment wife. 

Further members of the Sisterhood who have served God by loving me as family, friends or within our church are Gran, Vicki, Cheryl, Dorothy, Karen, Barbara, Modena, Kay, Vi, Bea, Sarah, Kimberly, Sylvana, Cammy, Avis, Anita, Nancy, and Mary. God has used these dear Sisters have shaped the pastor’s heart within me.

Matthew 22:37-39 holds the motto of the Sisterhood of the Great Commandment. Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

It means love God and others with all you’ve got. You Sisters do this so well. Agape love is self-sacrificing love that puts others first. It is the amazing love God has uses to woo us and shape us.

And, Sisters, we would not be who we are without you. Your influence is immeasurable. Thank you for your loving service 

Long live the Sisterhood of the Great Commandment!

Note: Sisterhood of the Great Commandment was written on contract for the May 2011 HomeLife Magazine. Unfortuantely, it was never published there returning rights to me 90 days later. This is its first publication. I share it on Mother's Day 2013 as a thank you to those mentioned and all our dear sisters in Christ. Photo: Love this one of M, JM & me; October 2012; by the talented Myra McCracken.

If you'd like to share a word of praise of thanks for a member of the Sisterhood who influenceed you, then please leave a comment and share this post too.

Tired of Mocking

When they were finally tired of mocking him, they took off the purple robe and put his own clothes on him again. Then they led him away to be crucified.—Mark 15:20 NLT

Smart. Maybe too smart for their own good. Possessing strong opinions. Maybe they can not even fathom anyone with a contrary opinion. Possibly mean-spirited. Maybe too mean to engage others well consistently. People. Made in God’s image. Who Jesus died to rescue. People struggling under sin. In need of grace. People as all of us.

Somewhere along the way we’ve met someone like this. They engage Christ followers not so much in debate to exchange or learn, but for sport. Blinded by pride in their own fallible intelligence they mock our faith.

Somewhere along the way they grow tired of Jesus. They crucify Christ in their own minds seemingly forever dismissing him as a rational possibility for their lives. Scars left by some religious happenstance in their past or unmentioned fear from the unexplainable unknowns of a ubiquitous God. 

Whatever the reason, like the company of soldiers in Mark 15, they grow tired of Jesus. Tired of mocking. Tired of sport. They have other things to do. So they crucify Jesus. And move on with their lives.

Until they meet a Christlike Christ follower—one who lives Christ winsomely attractive, not deadly judgmental—and they are confronted as an honest observers with the reality that Jesus did rise again. Indeed, he lives in us. As much as they have crucified him in their minds and dismissed him for whatever self-justifying reason, we show him alive! 

My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.—Galatians 2:20 NLT

May we be so much like Jesus that others grow tired of mocking. Not to crucify him. But to die to themselves.

The Jesus Who Isn't

Jesus: likable guy.

Kid’s loved him. Folks crushed close just to be near him. He was accused of having too much fun. He was the life of the party. He even brought life back to dead parties. Literally.

He rebelled against the status quo while making peace between us and God, our Great Judge. He called out sin while paying the price for it’s penalty. He enjoyed being among us only to be broken by us.

Jesus: what’s not to like? 

That depends. Do we like the Jesus who is? Or the Jesus who isn’t?

When we don’t like Jesus—most the time—it’s because we’ve got the wrong Jesus. The Jesus who isn’t.

That’s the Jesus who won't do what we want, how we want it, and when we want it.

That’s the Jesus who can't do what we want. It’d be sinful or just plain bad for us.

When Jesus isn't who we think or doesn't do what we want, we tend not to like him.

Who does that reveal more about? Jesus? Or us?

We tend to like the Jesus who isn’t. The Jesus who isn’t real, but is a god of our own creation. The Jesus we’ve fashioned, according to our own image or understanding. If only he’d perform as we like! But, of course, that’s the Jesus who isn’t.

How do we get to know the Jesus who is? Simple: read our Bible, lots, to be challenged and changed; pray, to be empty of self and full of him. Simple, yet not easy. That’s the Jesus who is.